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The WWE can bill this Sunday's Survivor Series main event between Bill Goldberg and Brock Lesnar as 'Fantasy Warfare' all they want, but the reality is that Vince McMahon and everyone involved in the match would much rather you believe this bout to be the first between the pair and not a rematch from the walloping turd of a match they put on 12 years ago, at WrestleMania XX.
Now, despite his immense popularity, even Goldberg himself will admit he wasn't exactly Ricky 'The Dragon' Steamboat during his late '90s prime, often being protected in the ring by much more capable workers. Brock Lesnar, however, is a mean, motherfucking suplexing boss of a performer and in March 2004 was fresh off a two year run of showstealing matches with The Rock, The Undertaker, Kurt Angle, Chris Benoit and Eddie Guerrero.
The problem was that, in March 2004, both Goldberg and Lesnar had decided they'd both had enough of pro wrestling; Goldberg disillusioned with how he'd been used in his barely 12 month long run in the WWE, while Brock was struggling with life on the road and believed a career in the NFL would be better suited to him.
The resulting contest was two of the biggest stars of their respective eras, refereed by the biggest star of any era, Stone Cold Steve Austin, getting the shit booed out of them by an enraged Madison Square Garden crowd as they did next to fuck all for 13 minutes which felt more like 13 months as an exasperated Austin almost had to pull the pair into each other to instigate any physicality.
A dozen years later and here we are again, just north of Madison Square Garden, over the Canadian border in Toronto for Lesnar vs Goldberg 2 at Survivor Series. Lesnar is undoubtedly more motivated this time round, given that he's put on some career best performances since his return to the squared circle in 2012, while Goldberg's supposed 'one shot' deal will surely mean that the 49-year-old former World Heavyweight Champion does all he can to bring his A Game. However, if Sunday's match resembles anything close to the pair's 2004 clusterfuck at the Garden, it's going to take a lot more than a few post-match Stone Cold Stunners to win the Toronto crowd over.
And, for those of you who are, fortunately, unacquainted with the 'Mania 20 nightmare, if you think the above highlight video doesn't make the match seem all that bad, here's the trainwreck in all it's glory:
Please Bill and Brock, anything but a repeat of this.
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