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We're no professional footballers, but we'd imagine trying to defend against Lionel Messi is a little like trying to replicate Michelangelo's ceiling painting in the Sistine Chapel with oven mitts superglued to your hands; any attempt is futile and you'll just end up making a very large mess of things.
However, we do now have some insight from someone who is a professional player, and who did, on several occasions, defend against the Argentine maestro.
Does Fabregas make it into our greatest Premier League Spanish XI:
Cesc Fabregas was speaking to TyC Sports about his former days at Barcelona with the world's greatest. (That's Messi, by the way. Ronaldo fanboys, the close button is far right of the tab.)
The two players spend time together in Catalonia during the true halcyon days of Guardiaolism and tika-taka football.
"There's one story which stays with me, others I can't tell you," said a tight-lipped Fabregas, presumably not wanting to discuss all the occasions Messi utterly humiliated him.
"I had to defend against him and you know he's going to the left, and he does, but he still makes me fall to the floor."
Don't worry, you're nothing special, Fabregas. You can add yourself amongst a countless list of names that Messi has done that to.
In fact, the list has become so exhaustive that rumour has it you are never no less than 20 metres away from someone who was once 'Messi-dropped.'
The former Barcelona man is holding no grudges, though, as he's come out to defend the 30-year-old global superstar after the five-time Ballon d'Or winner received a bunch of criticism for his underachievements with his international club.
It's one thing to drag a team along, it's another to drag a whole country along, guys.
Fabregas added, "When everyone lauds him for what he does, it doesn't seem normal to me that in [Argentina] they criticise him so much,"
"I can't understand it because it's where he should be valued the most."
Not bad. If only Fabregas defended Messi as well as this on the pitch.
Words by Jacque Talbot.
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