A Guide To Every Type Of Sunday League Player
Forget the Champions League, Sunday League is where you'll find football's greatest characters.
Boggy pitches, ProStar cagoules and referees who "like to let the game flow" - this weird and wonderful world has been enjoyed by so many.
All those who have experienced the joy of put the netting up for an 8:30 kick-off at the local park will know that pretty much every Sunday League team adopted the very same template.
And so using our esteemed experience at this level, we have decided to compile a list of every single type of Sunday League player and you're bound to relate to at least one.
The rough and ready centre-half
What he lacked in technical ability, he made up for with fire in his belly. Would head a medicine ball if you asked him to.
Toe-bunged goal-kicks up the pitch with his Umbro or Sondico boots and was sometimes thrown up front to cause chaos in the last five minutes of a crucial game.
The lazy moaner
This lad thought he was better than he was and regularly shifted the blame onto everybody else. Always wanted the ball into feet instead of in behind and ran less than Dimitar Berbatov.
The manager's son
Only got picked because his dad was running the team. Proudly displayed his captain's armband and could be heard barking orders such as "It's only nil-nil" or "Turn and face".
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Played every game as if he was doing an impression of Roy Keane in Turin back in 1999. 7/10 every week and absolutely loved a big, crunching tackle.
The tricky winger
Twinkle toes with No.7 or No.11 on his back. Spiky hair with loads of gel, gloves, snood, ankle protectors, tape, tights and Nike Mercurials all part of his look.
Had to put a plaster over his ear-ring before games. Had lots of pace and skill in his locker but thought he was Ronaldo. Refused to pass.
The one who could have made it
Supposedly had trials with a number of professional clubs but an unfortunate knee injury scuppered his chances of making it to the big-time.
The one who turned up late and hungover every week
Still owes a hundred quid in subs. Was known to have a big session the night before a game and would do well if he made it in time for the second half.
A half-time cigarette was part of his routine.
The one who made up the numbers
Did a lot of running about and gave it his all but very rarely ended up touching the ball. Often ended up taking the flag and doing the line.
Won 'Most Improved/Clubman of the Year' in the end of season awards.
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