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Daddy Cool: Celebrating The Mercurial Xabi Alonso

Daddy Cool: Celebrating The Mercurial Xabi Alonso

THIS STORY WAS ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED ON 9TH MARCH, 2017

News has broken this morning that Spain's finest midfielder/fashion icon Xabi Alonso is set to call time on his smoulderingly good looking career at the end of the season and we couldn't be more upset about it.

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OK, on the one hand, perhaps having his weekday afternoons and weekends free will allow the brilliant Basque bastard to finally get to work as a freelance features writer for Pitchfork and Rolling Stone, start a blog devoted to ranking each of Wes Anderson's films or even designing a capsule collection for H&M.

But let's be honest, no longer being to able to enjoy Alonso placing sixty yard passes onto a sixpence or casually knocking free kicks in top bins is going to be harder to get over than the ex who was a million miles out of your league and is now posting Instagram pictures of herself on a yacht with her wadded new fiance. Or the end of The Sopranos.



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For every reason Alonso gave us to idolise him on the pitch, he gave us about a dozen to love him off it, too. When he wasn't controlling the midfield for Real Sociedad, Liverpool, Real Madrid, Bayern Munich or Spain he was knocking the shit out of a shoot for any number of high brow fashion and lifestyle magazines, discussing his favourite Netflix series, paying tribute to the likes of Leonard Cohen, Johan Cruyff, James Gandolfini, Robin Williams and Lou Reed and, more pertinently, throwing his support behind humanitarian efforts and the Hillsbrough Justice Campaign.




It's rare for a footballer to be so universally appreciated. Rival fans even found it difficulty to pick fault with Alonso. In fact, as a Manchester United fan, even I winced when Paul Scholes hurled a wayward right hook Alonso's way during a fixture at Anfield in 2007 and it wasn't because I was worried about Scholes' impending red card. Yet that's the effect Xabi Alonso has on you, you can't even begrudge the bloke success at your own expense.

With his last lacing of the boots approaching, we thought it'd be best to remember the Spanish maestro's coolest moments over the course of his monumental career:

Here he is recently, auditioning for a recurring role in series four of Peaky Blinders...

Xabi Alonso
Xabi Alonso

Image: PA

"Suspended for the final? Well arsed, mate"

Xabi Alonso
Xabi Alonso

Image: PA

"Vanity Fair? Completed it, mate"

Xabi Alonso
Xabi Alonso
Xabi Alonso
Xabi Alonso
Xabi Alonso
Xabi Alonso

Images: Vanity Fair Spain

Sending sales of yer da's cardigan and trilby through the fucking roof...

Xabi Alonso
Xabi Alonso

"The fuck you on about 'we're going Yates'? I've just got another fucking pint in"

Xabi Alonso
Xabi Alonso

Here's a few beauties to weep over...

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His Twitter tributes are as poignant as his passes are accurate...






Reckon the lad should probably start curating playlists for Brooklyn dive bars, tbh...




We may never see his like again, so make the most of the luxurious Spaniard for the next five months. We'll keep our eyes peeled for his monthly column in Esquire and pop up photography exhibitions in Bilbao, Berlin and Copenhagen from June onwards.

Featured Image Credit: PA

Topics: Football News, Football, Xabi Alonso

Joe Baiamonte

Northerner. Assistant Editor of SPORTbible. Studied Journalism and Broadcasting in a portakabin on a car park of Salford University for three years. Believes football peaked with Serie A in the '90s and strong-arms pro wrestling references into as many articles as possible. Neymar once took 50 euros off me during a game of poker.

 

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