Yeah FIFA 19's great but have you ever wasted your entire I.T lesson in school playing Slime Soccer instead of doing your work? Because if you haven't then you've barely lived.
FIFA 19's demo dropped yesterday and I had the chance to lose to one of my colleagues on the office Playstation, might as well start as I mean to go on, I'm not exactly known as the best player in these parts.
Oh yeah look how realistic Mo Salah looks, but he's no colourful blob on the screen. Image: FIFA 19
Growing up my favourite football game was Sensible World of Soccer although I was turned on to the FIFA's in 1998 for the Road to World Cup and World Cup games.
However when I was a teenager along came the greatest game of a generation when someone gave us hope to get through the long dark days at school by inventing Slime Soccer.
Before there were smartphones Slime Soccer gave students something to do in I.T lessons and when they got on the computer at break or lunch.
Sure it just looks like two colourful blobs jumping up and down on a screen but it provided those of us of a certain age with a magical amount of entertainment during the day.
The ridiculous thing is we genuinely believed that being a different country would make a difference. I hated playing as Argentina but I was almost unbeatable with Senegal or Croatia, again they were just blobs that jumped up and down.
Still, I'm sure FIFA will be great, especially now you can foul people without even giving away a free kick.
FIFA 19 will include a House Rules mode that will allow players to turn off fouls completely and also get rid of the damned offside rule that blights our wonderful sport, who wouldn't want to play that?!
Just think of all the times that your mate has been running through on goal and you've got no issue to take him out but then you'd know you're about to pick up a red card, not anymore though.
The other mode in House Rules will also allow players to rewind to their school days and play Headers and Volleys, ahh those playground days.
There's also Survival Mode where players will lose a player in their team everytime they score, with the match going till someone's scored five.
Hook it to my veins!